VERONICA
Hello this is Rick Randberg here, with More Tales of Moral Outrage…. I am thinking now about a young girl many years ago whose parents
loved God. Her name was Veronica
Wright. When she was a young 
girl of five the favored TV show of youngsters was Captain Kangaroo. But Veronica
did not watch the show… For you see, Veronica’s parents did NOT have a TV set because they knew it was an
instrument of the devil…. They told Veronica if she ever
watched TV she would fall into the clutches of the devil and die a horrible death….Veronica
thought they were crazy, for she did not want to obey her
parents… Among the neighboring families
there in Mississippi was
a heathen family that actually had a colored TV set!! The Wrights knew not to associate with them after they saw their antenna go up on
top of the house…. But Veronica wanted to see what TV was all about so she wanted to make friends with the heathen’s young daughter… The Wright family
would not hear of it… They knew if Veronica entered the
heathen’s house she would see
TV … the
instrument of the devil…But Veronica was very resourceful… she had found some old
men’s adventure magazines in the attic left by some young
heathen that had lived there... she learned how to put sleeping pills in her parents
goodnight milk on Wednesday nights… This caused the parents to oversleep until
11 am on Thursdays, which did not matter because only the father had a job and
he supported the family by being the local Baptist preacher, so he really did
not do much of anything
… Veronica would take
advantage of the time her parents slept late by sneaking over to the window of
the heathen’s kitchen…. And looking in.. The heathen’s little daughter was always watching Captain
Kangaroo…. Veronica watched intently. No
one ever saw her because the heathen girl’s father had gone to his day job
and the heathen mother had gone back to bed… Veronica’s favorite part of the show was when the Captain would
take construction paper and make little art objects out of it… but one thing
she always noticed was how the baby scissors that the captain would use
on the
construction paper always made this Scrunch Scrunch
sound… CWAA!.. CWAA!… CWAA!… CWAA!. she became fascinated with the sound. She had never heard anything like that
before… for you see the Devil works in mysterious ways… and she became lured
into the trap of the devil by this (CWAA!.. CWAA!… CWAA!…) sound… Then suddenly one day, the heathen
family next door moved away… the father had gotten a job with the new President, Richard Nixon. Little Veronica
Wright’s TV days were over… As she
got older and was home schooled, she dreamed of going to the local community
college 75 miles away and becoming a graphic artist…. She remembered how Captain
Kangaroo had made those little heathen ART objects and she wanted to be just
like him……….Her parents thought this blasphemy, this desire to create heathen
ART…
They told her if she did not devote all her talents to the church, they would
disown her and never help her again.. But Veronica did not think that her parents
were correct. Just like when she was
five and they told her TV was bad …. When she graduated from home school with a ceremony in the local Baptist Church,
she decided to run away from home with some money she had stolen over the years
from the church collection plate… She was only 50 miles from her home one night when she met an interesting young man at the highway rest
stop…since her parents had kept her out of the world, she did not know to be wary…. he was
just a couple years older than Veronica…and very handsome and clean shaven, She told him how she had never seen TV…about her life
growing up as a Strict Holy Roller Baptist.
He told her he had watched a great deal of TV in his time… But He told her how his parents forbade him from
playing with toy guns when he was young.. how all the other
young boys in Mississippi
had toy guns and not having one made him feel so different …. She told him she
slipped out and watched TV when she was five… he told her how he would watch all the western
show reruns and gunfighter movies… they went for a walk in the woods… she
talked about Captain Kangaroo and her wish to be a graphic artist. The moon was very dark that night and the
woods were dark… She said without Captain Kangaroo she would have never left
home… He told her he had a similar TV hero, a man whose
name no one knew, a man that roamed from town to town with a homosexual sidekick,
a man that specialized in killing all the bad people that he came in contact with… He looked deep into her eyes… …
“For
you see, my dear”, he said…. “Watching the Lone Ranger made me want to become a
serial killer!” Veronica found out
too late that her parents were right. If
she had never watched that GODLESS HEATHEN TV she would have never left home in the first
place… You Godless heathen bastards!!! 